The Art of Letting Go

I’ve been learning a lot about letting go lately.  Having sent 2 children off to the other side of the world (one to a boarding school in India and one to a gap year in Europe) and also having to let go of Daniel’s health, llfe has offered me these lessons. And although I am far from graduation, I’m feeling schooled in the difficult art of loosening my grip on that which already exists.  It is a healing art, but an art form it is.

My alternative is holding on.  Wanting life to stay the same, gripping just a little bit tighter to keep things in order.  It feels sometimes like I’m holding life by a rope and it’s pulling through my fingers.  Not only are my hands getting burned but I’m missing all the fun. As I release the rope, my body relaxes and I can refocus my eyes on the wonders moving all around me.

Of course, we can’t always just let go.  There are times when holding on means organization, or safety or healthy predictability.  But most of life is remarkably beyond our control.  Can you control who falls in love with you?  Can you control whether you get cancer?  Can you control your adult children?  Can you control the economy? Can you control the weather? Can you control when you die?

I am learning that when I let go, when I surrender to ‘what is’ without resistance, I experience a huge relief.  Ahhhhhhhhh.  Letting things be as they already are creates a wave of acceptance that brings a measure of peace.  When I take my eyes off the rope, the vibrancy, and joys of life come alive all around me.

And it sure is handy to have my hands free!

Expcerpted from the Newsletter,

Still Waters:  Tools and Resources for Living Deeply”

Ashley Davis Bush, LCSW is the author of

Shortcuts to Inner Peace: 70 Paths to Everyday Serenity”


“Transcending Loss:  Understanding the Lifelong Impact of Grief and How to Make it Meaningful”

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