The Six Secrets to Divorcing Well

1. Accept things as they are – We don’t have control over many changes in our life – Our grief is greater when we resist these changes – This moment, as it is, is the beginning of the rest of your life

2. Choose Your Lens – How we view our life situation is a choice – An ending is not necessarily a failure – Will your lens be one of war or peace?

3.  Don’t take the Bait – Antagonism can trigger resistance and aggression – When we are aware, we can choose to respond differently – Observe the gap between feelings and response

4.  Be Compassionate – Compassion for others is a rich source of inner peace – Your anger is your biggest enemy – foster loving-kindness – Label your thoughts;  be a compassionate observer

5.  Honor the Process – Holding onto the past and/or fear of the future interferes – Be in the NOW – Allow yourself gratitude for today

6.  See the Big Picture – The tenor of your divorce sets the stage for your new life – You will have an ongoing connection with this person – Look 5, 10 years into the future; how small will this all be?

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