I recently became acquainted with a Dutch concept called Niksen. Niksen is the art of doing nothing. The idea is, well, to just sit there. No work, no distractions. No Facebook or journaling. No counting your breaths or repeating a…
Three Simple Steps to Self-Compassion
If you’re feeling more Grinch than Santa, more Scrooge than Elf, then you may need a little extra dose of tender loving care. And guess who is the best person to provide this TLC? YOU are. Self-compassion practices are remarkably…
Practicing Self Compassion
Having had the honor of listening to clients for over 28 years, I know that it’s very easy for people to fall into patterns of self-judgement, self-criticism, and even self-harm. In fact, depression, anxiety, and relationship conflict are often exacerbated…
Making Friends with Death
I recently attended a retreat the sole purpose of which was to meditate upon death. Gulp. Most people don’t really want to be on a first name basis with the grim reaper, if you know what I mean. And yet,…
Gratitude Glasses
It happened on the heels of a wonderful weekend away. I had just spent four days and three nights on a spiritual retreat praying and meditating, contemplating the gifts of life. I was aglow with gratitude. And then, shortly after…
Thawing the Frozen Heart
After your heart is broken, what happens? The natural reaction is to shut down, contract, and protect the remaining shards. In fact, for many people, after experiencing the searing pain of loss, their hearts begin to freeze over. Eternal winter.…
How are You Taking Care of Yourself?
Recently, two people told me that they’re finally going to start taking care of themselves this year. They had let themselves get run down and run over after decades of thinking that self-care was selfish. I applauded their efforts to…
Are You A River or A Lake?
Life, like a river, can at times be rushing, wild, and swift. You can have days, years, even decades that resemble the high intensity energy of a river. Yet, life can also be like a lake — calm, spacious, and…
Life after Death
Saying goodbye last year to my sweet furry friend, Hickory, was heartbreaking. My constant companion of 15 years, he was with me as I raised and launched my children. He followed me as I lived with one husband and then…
Requiem
Requiem . . . Latin for “rest.” It comforts me to imagine a resting place of heavenly peace for all those whom we have loved and lost; a place where they are granted a peace so sublime that there is…