When I began my training as a psychotherapist over twenty years ago, I was assigned to work with a middle-aged woman whose sister had recently been murdered.  There I was, a young professional with very little life experience who had, until a few months previously, been pushing paper in a PR firm.  And yet I was asked to console this woman paralyzed by grief.

 To my surprise, I did just that.  I was able to listen compassionately and nonjudgmentally.  Inexplicably really, I could hear and understand her pain.  And I knew without a doubt that I had a calling to work with grievers, to help people in emotional pain. (more…)

“When one door closes, another door opens.”  I have always found this expression to be so comforting.  Even when it takes awhile to determine what door has opened and where, it always seems to be true.

I extend my thanks again for your support over these two years of blogging.  I have received so many kind and thoughtful responses, which I deeply appreciate.  As the “Transitions . . . where endings meet beginnings” blog ends, so begins the monthly newsletter, “Still Waters:  Tools and Resources for Living Deeply.” (more…)

I recently heard of a friend’s mother’s dying process.  “It’s just awful,” my friend said, “they’ve got hospice in the house and she’s just got a few days left.”  Meanwhile, I learned that this elderly woman is surrounded by her husband, children, and grandchildren, all of whom have had an opportunity to share their love. (more…)

I’m a Gleek, a devoted fan of the Fox show “Glee.”  I’ve been watching avidly for two years.  Although it’s a musical drama about a high school glee club, they sensitively tackle serious subjects like bullying, homosexuality, teen pregnancy, divorce, and now death.

As a grief therapist, I was curious to see how they might treat this subject in the most recent episode, “Funeral.”  Sue Sylvester (the viciously cruel gym teacher) lost her beloved sister and was devastated.  She shut down in her pain. (more…)

I can’t help but notice that it’s Friday the 13th.  I know it’s just a silly superstition.  After all, I own a black cat that walks in front of me frequently.  I bought a house that was #13.  My step daughter broke a mirror but we haven’t noticed 7 years of bad luck.

Still, I find myself treading a little lightly on this day of inauspicious portent.  It’s not a day I would choose for making a risky investment or asking for favors.  I prefer to let it pass quietly.

Superstition aside, I believe we create our own luck by our beliefs.  I recently heard a friend say “With my luck, the plane will be delayed several hours.”  “Not true for me” I thought, “I feel quite lucky.  With my luck the plane will land safely!” 

Most people are as lucky as they choose to see.  When we focus on our many blessings and our outrageous good fortune to be alive at this time in history in this country of bounty, we begin to see how lucky we are.  I still don’t plan to buy a lottery ticket today, but I know that today and every day is my lucky day.

Ashley Davis Bush, LCSW is the author of

 “Transcending Loss:  Understanding the Lifelong Impact of Grief and How to Make it Meaningful”

 To order a copy Click Here